


Worth it?

by Captain0306A



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types
Genre: Childhood Memories, Flashbacks, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-01
Updated: 2018-01-01
Packaged: 2019-02-26 07:44:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,418
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13231152
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Captain0306A/pseuds/Captain0306A
Summary: They’d just fled the First order’s clutches by seconds, but to be honest, was it worth it?Poe thinks back to his childhood where life was simple and 'he' was there.(Set just after The last Jedi)(Contains spoilers)





	Worth it?

They were on the Falcon, escaping its orbit, they’d just fled the First order’s clutches by seconds, but to be honest, was it worth it? They’d lost so many of their own, so much of what they hardly had and, yet they still celebrated between those who remained, they still let out shouts of cheer. They hadn’t won, not by a long shot, but then again who had? They’d lost everything except a freighter filled with people, the First order had lost their leader and a majority of their military force and the New Republic had been obliterated, they all lost in one way or another.

All these thoughts rushed through Poe’s mind as he sat in a turret of their final ship. He was happy that they’d escaped with what they had but he still wondered if this would do anything, fighting, protecting.

He looked out across the open space filled with stars, he used to do it when he was a child back on Yavin IV, he remembered the memories of his childhood, he remembered looking at the stars with _him_ , the pilot wished _he_ was here, _he_ 'd know what to do, how to feel. Poe really missed _him._

 

_17 years after the Battle of Endor_

_It was a clear night on Yavin, the stars were out, and a 10-year-old Poe was sitting at his window, dreaming of a future life of flying, he spent most of his nights like this, believing. Ever since he was young, his mother would take him up to meet the nightly skies in her A-wing, over time she taught her son basic controls, that was until she died, the last thing she’d said to Poe was to fly, grow-up. Have a family and fly, he had made a promise to her he would, a promise he was never going to break._

_Looking from one star to the next, Poe longed to encounter those stars, it was his goal. His star gazing was cut short when a bright flash caught his attention, it came from the woods which was quite a usual site what with the village pranksters, however, something seemed different about this flash, Poe had the sudden urge to explore its origins. He got off his windowsill and hurried to his wardrobe where he got a pile of equipment he used for exploring, moving to his bed, the young boy flicked a switch, causing a small droid to bounce to life, beeping alarmingly._

_“Yeah, I know it’s late BB8, but I saw something, like a flash, it came from the forest and I’m going to check it out, you in?” the small droid scanned the village area, Poe was right, there were readings of unknown energy nearby. He was programmed to protect Poe and knew alerting Kes would be better, but Poe was already out the window when he beeped at his owner, “Come on then” Poe said reaching out to the droid._

_He came to a clearing where a marked-out burn was imbedded into the dirt, Poe checked his surroundings like his father had always told him to do, nothing. He stepped closer to the burn, BB8 hot on his heels, as he went to touch the mark he heard rustling. He got out his blaster, a “gift” from an uncle in the rebellion, pointing it to the whereabouts of the sound, nothing, he must be paranoid. As he turned around he was met with a staff aimed at his face, he looked over to see its owner. Above him stood a boy of equal age, his hair was a dark colour and his eyes were crystal blue. The boy must have been just shorter then Poe was, he was holding a makeshift stick, an odd choice of weapon, Poe thought, behind himself, a very cowardly BB8 hid behind Poe’ leg, seeking protection from his owner_

_“Hey?” Although scared, Poe’s usual happy state remained in his voice, a trait he hoped was handy in circumstances like this._

_“Where am I?” the boy replied with an unusual accent, “Who are you and where am I?”_

_Poe took in a breath, “I’m Poe Dameron and you’re on Yavin IV” he focused his eyes on the staff’s prickly tip, that would hurt._

_“Where the heck is Yavin IV? Europe? America?” The boy seemed both sacred and irritated as if he was being pranked._

_Now Poe was confused, Europe? America? Are those planets? “It’s in the Yavin system”_

_“But that makes no sense, a ‘system’? Where on Earth are we?” he shouted the latter question_

_“What’s an ‘earth’?” Poe was getting more confused by the minute_

_Shock covered the boy’s face, “NO! no, no, no, this isn’t real, I’m dreaming” the boy began lowering his stick, he stepped back a bit suddenly feeling a bit nausea from his unexpected trip, he slumped to the ground instantly becoming unconscious as a very muddled Poe stood up. There was either something wrong with this boy or he was very lost. He let BB8 scan for injury but came back with nothing, he decided bringing the sleeping boy back to his house would be the safest option even if his father will not be pleased after finding out Poe snuck off somewhere. He hauled the boy’s body over his shoulder, although he was young, Poe still had a decent amount of strength on him._

_Arriving at his home, the young Dameron gently placed the boy onto a chair just as his father walked into the room, becoming alert at the unknown child in his room_

_“Poe buddie, where’d you find the kid?” Kes quickly looked over both boys for injury_

_“Well I saw a bright light in the forest, so I went to check it out. This kid was there, he seemed really confused where he was, saying stuff like, ‘where on earth are we?’ then he dropped to sleep so I thought bringing him here was the best option” Poe looked at his father, he couldn’t read any emotion from his face, “Sorry for going out after bed”_

_The older Dameron sighed, “It’s alright, you had your blaster on you, right? So at least you were safe” He knelt, placing a hand on his son’s shoulder as he further studied his new guest, “Question is what are we gonna do with you?”_

_As if he knew he was being spoken to, the boy began to stir awake, opening his eyes slowly, gradually becoming more attune to his surroundings. He noticed Poe sitting nearby and let out a sigh of irritation, it wasn’t a dream._

_He slowly went to rise from the chair but was stopped by a stronger hand pushing him down, his eyes met the older man in the room, “Slow down there, kid, we don’t know what you’ve been through and you might hurt yourself.” The friendly advice seemed to put the boy at ease, sitting back into the chair in a position that looked like he was being told off. “Look, I’m Kes Dameron, you’ve already met Poe, we’re just concerned, Poe says you’re from ‘Earth’?”_

_“Yeah, that’s right.” He wouldn’t meet the elder’s gaze instead choosing to stare at the floor._

_“Do you mind telling me where that is?”_

_The new arrival finally looked up, “I don’t really know what to tell you, it’s part of a solar system, it’s in the Milky Way galaxy?” he looked like he was explaining something impossible which, up until now, was impossible to explain, the only people the kid had ever known were humans from Earth._

_“I don’t know what to tell you kid, I’ve travelled the galaxy, I’ve never heard of Earth or the Milky Way” Poe noticed a mix of disbelief and sadness seep over the boy’s face as did Kes, the two Damerons looked at each other, the younger with pleading eyes and the elder with knowing ones, “You’re welcome to stay here? We have a spare bedroom that’s never used?”_

_The boy just about manged to say thank you when he was being pulled down the hall by a very excited Poe as he baffled on about everything leaving a worried Kes to question a shamed BB8._

_After settling in, curiosity took over Poe, asking his new friend the question he’d wanted to ask since he arrived, “So, do you know how you got here?”_

_The new arrival thought carefully, “Not really, one minute I was in my room, the next, there was a blinding light that took me to wherever we are.”_

_“I’m sorry we can’t help you” They sat in silence until the kid give out a yawn, forcing Poe to realise the time, “I’ll let you get some sleep” he went to leave when a thought stopped him in his tracks, turning around to the other, “I never asked your name?”_

_The new guest smiled, “I’m Olly, Olly Garret”_

_“Goodnight Olly Garret” he closed the door and smiled, this was the start of something special, he knew it._

Poe smiled at the remembrance of his friend,

he missed Olly.

Suddenly, the screen in front of him flashed red as beeping came from the computer. Poe rushed back up the ladder, sprinting to the cockpit where Rey and her fellow co-pilot Chewbacca sat pressing buttons in panic as General Organa stood over their shoulders frowning what was to come.

"What's going on?" the alarmed pilot said, startling an already annoyed General

"We have cruisers blocking our escape, there's no way out" Rey shouted, her anxiousness showing across her face, she turned to the elder woman in the room, seeking an order "What should we do?"

Leia moved to the chair behind her, sitting down in shock, "I...I... I don't know, there's nothing we can do"

Silence rang out in the cock-pit as they all sat in surrender.

Poe was answering his earlier question, was it worth it? apparently not. He stretched his hand out to the retired Princess, gripping her frail hands in his, "We had a good run" he chuckled at how cliché it was, "There's nothing more we can do but hope our message got out"

The four agreed with the statement

A beeping BB8 came rolling around the corner in hurry, stopping at his owner's feet

"What do you mean you received a message saying, 'Hang on'?" the pilot crouched down to his droid, checking for damage

The seated Wookie scanned the screen of the controls, turning to Rey to release a growl

"There's another ship?" the girl said re-checking the screen "I'm getting the same message here as BB8, it's from an unknown frequency"

Abruptly in front of them appeared an enormous cruiser, pulling into a position where its front faced the First order's fleet, a voice came over the speakers in all the ships near the planet, "This is Director of the freedom alliance, stand-down and escape or we will take action" in the newly-arrived ship's bridge, a hologram appeared to the Director. The hologram projected an officer of the First order beginning a rant of fury, "This Admiral Flightets, surrender in the name of the Fir-"

The Director released a sigh as he muted the manic voice, "Why are bad guys always so aggressive? Fire warning shots to their cruisers and open a channel to the freighter"

In the Falcon a voice once again spoke to the confused crew, "If this is the Millennium Falcon of the Resistance then you are clear to land in our hanger"

In the falcon’s cockpit, the three beings and droid looked at the General for confirmation to which she nodded, not knowing herself what to do.

Taking the warning shots as an attack, the admiral aboard the leading star destroyer ordered all its ships to fire against the 'Alliance' cruiser, not even marking the ship that now stored the Falcon, turning away from its foes the ship quickly jumped into hyperspace leaving an Admiral scared for his life as he awaited the return of the new Supreme Leader Kylo Ren.

 

Being the first one to leave the lucky piece of junk, Poe walked down the ship's ramp into a hanger filled with rushing officers who didn't seem to pay notice to the pilot, instead concentrating on the many star-fighters dotted around the hanger floor. Behind him, the remains of the Resistance joined the Captain (or lieutenant, no one knew if Leia had really demoted him)

Across the hanger, a blast door opened as a dark-skinned female officer with very dark, long hair rushed over to the new arrivals carrying a data pad in her arms, "General Organa, I'm sorry we could not arrive soon enough. We have medical officers at the ready and the canteen is stocked up" She stopped realising the people in front of her showed little understanding, "Sorry, my bad, the Director said he knew you? When we got your message, he made it his priority to get to you"

The Princess smiled, "I'm grateful for your assistance but I don’t know who this ‘Director’ is” as she was finishing her sentence, she noticed a face behind the window that oversaw the entire hanger. She let out a breath she didn’t know she was holding in, she thought she’d never see that face again after many years without it, a tear seeped its way from her eye as the face she gazed upon smiled back. Leia turned back to the officer, “Where are we needed?”

After further explanation, the officer started to lead the general followed by Rey to the bridge as instructed as the rest of the resistance made their way to either the medical bay or the mess hall

“General, what can I do?”

She turned to see Poe still by the Falcon’s ramp, she smiled, “Reunite” she turned back, following the officer out of the crowded hanger.

Poe stood there even more confused, they just landed on an unknown allied-ship and now he was being told to ‘reunite’? With what? His face scrunched up in annoyance, before he relaxed, taking out a letter from his pocket, he’d always kept the letter with him, it made him feel like _he_ was still here, he reread the lines like he always did in times like this.

Across the hanger, the doors reopened again, this time a figure in all black walked in, his hair was styled into a reddish quiff, he studied the Pilot sat at the Falcon, he began to walk but stopped a few steps from where he started. He knew that letter.

Poe finished on the last lines, ‘We’ll meet again, can’t tell you when or how but we will, and all you have to do is look up’ he obliged to the letter looking up at meeting eyes staring back at him. The pilot’s mouth opened in disbelief, that wasn’t possible, he had died, he couldn’t be there. Poe slowly got up and made the journey along the hanger floor until he was of whispering distance of the boy he’d long to feel after so many years, “Y-your still alive?”

“Don’t sound too disappointed” the figure’s voice was like music to the pilot’s ears “It’s been a long time”

Their eyes never left each other.

“Too long” Poe reached forward and tugged the boy into a tight embrace that was copied by the boy. “Do I even want to know how?”

“No, too boring of a story” the boy said from his place, wedged in by Poe’s neck, “I missed you”

“I missed you too.” They stayed in their embrace for what felt like an eternity for both until Poe opened his cocky mouth, “Cutting it close back there, Olly”

 

_It was Olly’s second night at the Dameron’s, and Poe couldn’t sleep, he’d spent the entire day with Olly, educating him on the galaxy and how they lived. He got out of his bed and snuck his way down the hall to his new friend’s room. Walking in he noticed a very awake Olly staring back at him from his sitting position on the new bed,_

_“Can’t sleep either huh?” Poe sat next to Olly on the bed_

_“It’s kinda hard when you know you might never see your friends again” Olly looked down at the floor again_

_“I’m sorry that there’s nothing we can do” Poe copied his saddened peer “What about your family? Won’t they miss you?”_

_“They’ll be happy I’m gone, never really had a proper family”_

_At this Poe perked up, “Well now you do, I can be your family” that caused the other to giggle slightly_

_“Your nuts you know that?”_

_“Those type of people tend to be the best”_

_Since that conversation, Poe and Olly were hardly apart, they’d do everything together, it was a type of relationship between being brother’s and being friends._

_Olly had grown happier over the years, never forgetting his past but happy for where he was now. Being from another planet, Olly had shown the Damerons different things that humans did on earth such as Christmas, music etc. Whereas the Damerons also showed Olly a few things such as Life day._

_Growing up Poe had become very sexually confused, he used to like girls and had even been caught by Olly making out with a few, but now he wasn’t sure. He thought he liked a certain boy but as cliché as it sounded, he wasn’t sure if that boy liked him on that level._

_He was currently sitting on his bed, with 15-year-old Olly’s legs on his lap as he drew a picture that Poe had requested. 16-year-old Poe was finishing some homework that he’d left till the day before as per usual. He set down the paper, looking over to Olly who was hard at work, “Hey Olly? Do you ever think about girls?”_

_Olly’s blue eyes didn’t leave the page as he bluntly replied, “Nope”_

_“What about boys? Do you think about boys?” this triggered a glance from the boy_

_“I guess, I mean you are a boy, I think about you a lot, why?”_

_The tanned teen blushed, “Just, I wanna ask this person out but I’m not sure if they feel that way”_

_Olly perked up from hearing that, now curious in Poe’s statement, “Is it Sara? No wait Helen?”_

_The teen grinned “neither, look stop guessing, I just wanna know what you think I should do”_

_“Do they show any signs of liking you?” Poe shrugged “Okay, well, it depends on how much confidence you have and if your ready to be shot down, not to be too harsh”_

_“You could never be.” The two boys smiled at each other for a few moments, getting lost in each other “Fancy going to the Massassi temple?”_

_The abandoned rebel base was a typical hangout spot for the pair, no one else came in due to it being a decent walk from the village, as well as the ghost stories told about its insides._

_They were sitting on the overview balcony of the main hanger that now stored emptiness as its cargo._

_“Olly?”_

_“Yeah?”_

_“Can you sing that song from last time?”_

_“Sure” this was how it commonly went, Poe would listen to Olly sing a song from his life on Earth, it was just a thing they did. Finishing the song, Olly rested his head on Poe’s shoulder, closing his eyes._

_He expected it to come from Poe’s mouth but was startled when an unknown voice praised him, “That was beautiful” Both boys jumped, quickly getting up to see who the voice belonged to._

_Strolling out of the shadows, a middle-aged woman looked at the pair with calm eyes “Don’t worry, I was just looking for something, I’ll leave when I find it.”_

_Olly looked closely at the woman as she walked away, he’d seen her on holo-vids, “Your Leia Organa” at the name both Leia and Poe froze._

_“That is correct” the now-named woman said as she slowly turned around._

_“You flew with my mother, Shara Bey” Poe couldn’t look at the lady_

_“Miss Bey, she was an excellent pilot, I am sorry for her passing” Leia’s voice was filled with true sympathy_

_Poe looked at the lady with hurt in his eyes, before making his way out of the room, Olly knowing he’d return home._

_“I’m sorry Ms Organa, he for some reason believes you’re to blame for her death” Organa nodded in acknowledgement, “So, what are you looking for?”_

_“Information the rebellion left behind in our escape, we need it as evidence”_

_“To fight back against the Empire?”_

_“Yes, although the war has ended, some people still think the alliance are the bad guys”_

_“Well, if it’s data you need then I suggest using the terminals in the command room, they’re the only ones working”_

_“Thank you” Princess went to leave when she was stopped_

_“How would somebody like me be able to do what you do?”_

_“What fight?_

_Olly nodded, he’d forever wondered what he’d do with his life, never finding his calling until perhaps, now, “I wanna help people who can’t protect themselves.”_

_A small smile found its way onto Leia’s face, “If you want to join the Allian-“ she corrected herself, “the New Republic, then all you need to do is ask. Come, walk with me.”_

_They continued their talk deep into the night, both forgetting the time of day when Leia finally got her data. Olly had been given the option to go with Organa to Chandrila, where he would be the senator’s student, helping the New Republic change for the better._

_He was almost sure he wanted to take the offer but first needed to seek advice._

_When he got home the first thing he did was knock on Kes’s office door, entering the room he was met with Kes hard at work on something most likely to do with his role as village leader_

_“Your home late Olly, everything okay?” the older man kept working on his current activity, not bothering to look at the teenager._

_“I was in the temple…” Kes didn’t budge, it was typical of him to be in the temple, “Leia Organa was there, and we talked.” Any movement in the room stopped, Kes swung round on his chair to face Olly, motioning him to continue, “We talked about the Alliance and about what it stood for. I said I wanted help in the cause, she offered me a role, only as a student diplomat but, it’s a start.”_

_Kes didn’t know what to think, he wanted both his boys to do something great but, Olly being with someone as well known as Senator Organa, that had to be risky, he thought for a minute longer, “If it’s what you wanna do then go for it, I’m not going to stop you, this is your decision but perhaps you should tell Poe.”_

_Olly smiled at the man he viewed as a father-figure, “Thanks Kes” he said leaving the room to find Poe._

_As Olly entered the room Poe looked over to him from his perch at the window, he was studying the stars as he normally did with BB8 at his feet, “Okay?” Olly’s words of concern did little to disrupt his mind_

_“Yeah just couldn’t bear to look at her” Poe reached out his hand as Olly walked over, sitting between Poe’s legs as the taller boy held him close, “What took you so long?”_

_“I was talking with…her” Olly knew the other didn’t like his answer, he could feel the embrace around him tightened, he was sure Poe wouldn’t like what he about to say next, “We talked about the alliance and the New Republic.” After a moment of silence, he continued, “She offered me a job in the senate.”_

_The grip on Olly slackened as Poe spoke a whisper, “Don’t.”_

_“Poe, I’m a nobody in this galaxy, I don’t even belong here” Olly went to play with the boy’s hand when it was taken from him_

_“No, you’re not a nobody, you’re my friend and I’m not letting you go out and get yourself killed” Poe got up from his spot, standing in the middle of his room, his back facing Olly._

_“Oh, so, you are aloud to go out and fight in wars and battles, possibly killing yourself, while I’m not aloud to fight for what’s right by using my voice? What am my supposed to do with my life, wait for you to return?” Both boys were now standing, their voices increase in volume as BB8 cowardly hid himself away. “Yes, you were supposed to protect me when we were young but, I’m fifteen now, I can take care of myself!” Poe didn’t even respond, instead picking up his discarded work, busying himself. “I’m going to take the offer whether you like it or not, you have the option to support me, I don’t wanna loose by best friend.”_

_With that, Olly left the bedroom making his way to his own where he contacted Leia about his answer. He’d have to leave tomorrow so he began packing his stuff, trying to take his mind off the argument, just wanting to not think as tears trickled his cheeks. He felt a nudge at this leg, looking down to see BB8 holding a tissue out for him, “Oh BB8” Olly crotched down to hug the welcoming droid._

_Morning came quickly and Kes was helping Olly with his luggage, “So how long will it be until you come and visit?”_

_“About 6 months, if that.” He said throwing his case into the speeder. He looked back at the house, focusing on Poe’s window, expecting a face to appear but nothing did._

_“I’ll finish up here, you go see him” the older Dameron said taking Olly’s bag from him._

_Olly walked through the halls of what he’d call his home, it was like someone going to university back on Earth he thought, only difference was he was 15, younger, perhaps too young. He knocked on his favourite door of the house, no response. He opened the door that gated a room of darkness, he was still asleep, laying on the bed. Olly sat on the bed, pushing a brown curl of hair behind a red ear. He leant down, placing a kiss on the sleeping teen’s temple as tear escaped his eyes. Olly got back up straightening his shirt as he fetched an envelope from his pocket, placing it on Poe’s nightstand. He turned to leave when he remembered the ring on the chain he wore that was given to him by Poe, he removed it from his body, weaving it around the hand of his sleeping peer. He briskly left the room, leaving the door ajar, taking one last peak before leaving._

_He shut the front door behind him as he made his way to the speeder, Kes already inside. He got in turning to Kes with tear-ridden eyes, “He’s just mad, I bet when you come back he’ll welcome you back with open arms.”_

_From an upstairs window, BB8 looked out to the speeder, the small droid beeped with panic, Poe hadn’t said goodbye and Olly was already leaving. He vigorously rolled down the corridor, chucking himself down the stairs. He raced into Poe’s bedroom, using a board to get onto the bed, landing on his owner’s stomach, forcing him to awake_

_“Oof! BB8 what was that for?” he slowly got up, placing the madly beeping droid onto the floor, “What do you mean he’s leaving?” With a mechanical arm, the small droid pointed to the ring in Poe’s hand, “Why would Olly give this to me?“ He listened carefully, the family speeder was on. Poe dashed out his room followed by his companion rolling behind him. The teen opened the door, catching a glance of the speeder going down the path, out of sight._

_He left._

_He’s gone off with Organa._

_And he didn’t say goodbye._

_Slumping back onto his bed, Poe wasn’t sure if he wanted to cry or scream with anger, paper caught his eye, placed by his lamp was an envelope with ‘Poe’ written on it. He held the paper in his hands as if it were glass, he opened it carefully before reading. Tears fell from his eyes, it was a goodbye letter,_

_‘We’ll meet again, can’t tell you when or how but we will, and all you have to do is look up’_

_Those were the last words Olly gave Poe before **it** happened._

 

They strode through the corridors arm in arm, “so you’ve been busy” the pilot said as officers rushed past them

“So, have you, becoming a resistance pilot. And you said my job was dangerous.” They entered an empty elevator, the doors closing as Poe turned to Olly,

“I’m sorry I treated you before you left, I just didn’t want to lose you” they hugged once again, if it had been anyone else, Poe would have been sick of being so close, “But seriously, where’ve you been?”

Olly grinned, “I ome how got back to Earth, from their I created the alliance, I’ve been busy trying to find a way back.” Olly leant back from Poe, “And I did. I just wasn’t allowed to see you.”

“But why, who stopped you from coming?” Poe cupped the boy’s head in his hands

“The council of leadership, members of each country, joined together to decide on our actions, they stopped me from making our organisation known to you for safety reasons. I wasn’t even supposed to save you, but I made you a promise to see you again.”

They continued to smile at each other, even when the lift stopped, and the doors opened, they just smiled.

“Director, we have an incoming message from the council” the owner of the intrusion, a tall male Tollist, green-skinned with red eyes.

Olly broke their shared stare, looking at the data pad he’d been thrown, “Thank you P’uw. Any signs of damage?”

All system officers concluded with no negative results from the skirmish.

“I’ll take the call in the ready room” The redhead pulled Poe into the spacious meeting room where Leia, Rey and the female officer from earlier sat. Leia got up from the site of Olly, hugging him with a mother’s love, a love she was not using on her own son.

They’d talked about the state of the galaxy for a while until Olly was reminded about the awaiting call, starting it from a press of a button. 4 screens lit up showing shadowed figures, one of them opening the discussion, “Director Garret, we told you to standby and await command, instead to went through with a rescue mission, accomplishing nothing.”

The brunette Jedi, studied the voice, it was of a similar tone to Unkar plutt, a slight shiver creeped down her back, she’d almost forgotten about the slave owner, too caught up in the moment to care.

She was distraught that Luke had gone but felt an urge of something she didn’t know. She was so close to saving Ben, if only Snoke hadn’t clouded his vision. That was one good thing though, Snoke had been killed, the first order had lost its leadership, even if someone already took his place.

She studied her new ally, Director Garret, Leia seemed to trust him, so he must be a good person. The brunette looked over at Dameron, they’d recently met on the falcon, exchanging names, he seemed a good man too and one hell of a pilot. She looked at his face, he seemed at peace, as if everything had fallen into place, she dived further into the force, curious what led to the Pilot being so relaxed, memories were given to her, flashbacks of a darkened-haired kid like Roger, she saw visions of Poe cuddling the boy, he must’ve been Poe’s boyfriend.

“The reason I did is because I’m loyal to my allies. Also, I did accomplish something, I brought back a leader that inspired this alliance as well as a Jedi.”

The elderly woman gazed at Poe’s face that was conveying peace and happiness, she knew Poe had missed him, she was the one who personally told him after the incident. Since then, she’d worked hard to become close to the pilot, visiting him often as well as ordering him on special missions when the young Dameron joined the New Republic. When the Resistance was in its early days, she personally sought out help from the skilled pilot, giving him full command of her fighter squadron. From her time with him, Leia had learnt about Poe and Olly’s relationship, she knew they weren’t together but looking at the way Poe looked at the Director, she knew he wanted him, she hoped he did.

A shadowed woman spoke up from her screen, “I agree with Director Garret, we need the allies we can get, not forgetting we now have the resistance as our friends. Yes, it would have been wise to wait for command, but I personally congratulate you on your success”

Poe looked over to the boy he once spent every waking moment with, he felt liked if he blinked, the figure in front of him would fade away. His gaze didn’t leave him, he mentally recorded each action Olly took, trying to get caught up on his friend’s every norm, the words spoken in the room becoming muffled whispers in his mind.

He’d spent so long mourning him, he’d shut out everyone for weeks, he blamed himself, he blamed Organa, he blamed anyone for what happened.

_It had been 2 years since he had been home, he was supposed visit 6 months after he left but everything had become so busy. A governmental disruption on an outer rim planet compelling him and the senator to intervene. It had been a simple mission to begin with but as time went on, both sides of the conflict used drastic measures to enforce their point, endangering any chance of the two diplomats escaping when by pure luck, allies of the ex-princess were able to carry out a pick-up for the two, providing transportation back to republic space._

_They were in the clear, after long periods of time surviving on the planet of war, they were in the clear, or at least they were supposed to be. Olly was quick to send a message to his home, telling them he’d be back soon, that was what he thought. But soon he was met with alarms wringing around the small corvette signalling an attack, it seemed the planet’s inhabitants didn’t want them to leave alive._

_He’d rushed to the bridge in time to see their escort of fighters be destroyed as the lead enemy ship docked to theirs. He knew they wouldn’t get to the escape pods in time, they would be cut down by soldiers. Olly took short time in thinking what Poe or Kes would do in this situation, they’d save the others, even if it meant not saving themselves._

_As they entered a hallway, Olly quickly shut door behind Leia and the fleeing officers, she turned around looking through the window at Olly’s face that showed both knowing and sadness._

_A tear fell from the senator’s eyes, she was supposed to keep him safe, not the opposite._

_Before she could argue, Olly was running down the corridor, not wanting to look back at the woman’s face in despair, instead rushing back to the bridge where he prepared the ship’s system for self-destruct sequence. He made sure to monitor the escape pods, watching the screens indicating they’d departed and the only beings on the ship were himself and the attackers. He started the sequence, his hand shaking to the button._

_30 seconds_

_He knew Poe would be mad, it was his go-to thing when something happened, like when his mom died, Kes had told of how rebellious Poe had been after Shara’s passing, it was all to do with him being mad at Organa, Poe blamed her because he thought she was the cause of Shara’s death when, in truth, his mother had passed away from natural causes. Olly prayed Poe wouldn’t do anything stupid in his anger._

_15 seconds_

_He imagined Poe in his head, staring back at him, Olly could never bring himself to admit to his friend that he had a small crush on him. They were so close, almost nothing could break them apart, almost, and yet Olly didn’t want to ruin what they had, he didn’t want to ruin their relationship that to anyone else would seem unclear._

_5 seconds_

_He hoped Poe would have a good life, grow up, join the republic, fly. Olly hoped Poe continued flying, it was the boy’s dream_

_0 seconds_

_Boom_

_Olly witnessed the monitors panicking at the sudden loss of ship. However, looking around, time seemed to have slowed. He saw the door to the bridge be thrown open in slow motion revealing a mouth of fire._

_It was a strange feeling, one he hadn’t felt since…_

_Flash_

_A blinding light covered his gaze until it ceased as quick as it came. Olly focused his eyes as the surroundings came into focus, he was back,_

_Back to his past home_

_Back to…_

_Earth._

_It had taken 2 days for Leia to arrive on Yavin IV, she’d made this her primary mission before anything else._

_She knocked on the grand oak door, hearing sudden movement inside, the door flew open displaying an ecstatic Poe shadowed by a small BB unit. She looked the anxious teen in the eyes, feelings of grief and misery able to be read from her face. Poe’s mood fell in disbelief as tears began falling freely, he went to shout at the bearer of bad news but found nothing would come out, instead falling to the ground, hands covering his eyes as another set of hands encased themselves around the boy’s frame._

_They spent hours crying that night, only to be joined by Kes who shared their emotion. For the two adults, they’d lost a child. For Poe, he’d lost his meaning of life._

\---------------------

Poe came back into realisation when his eyes saw Olly looking down at him, his mouth moving, he looked around, all eyes were on him, shoot

“Sorry can you say that again” he straightened himself out on the chair, making it look like he was listening.

The red-head he’d been staring at sighed, “I said, what with the growing danger of the first order, would it be wise for the Resistance to relocate back on Earth?”

Poe was puzzled, why was he being asked? Organa was the one in charge. “Uh…Yes…we need time to regroup, gain members, rebuild. If you’ll have us, we’d be thankful for a safe-haven.” Smooth Dameron.

“Perfect, we’ll ready a base, Director, I’ll expect you to accompany our guest’s arrival” another voice stated on the shadowed screen.

Olly agreed with the order before the screen went dark, signalling they’d finished

“We have a few hours before we arrive, I recommend getting a bite to eat and some rest, if you need me, I’ll be on the bridge” Olly began typing something on his screen before leaving the room to the bridge joined by the female officer, leaving the others to relax.

“Olly, maybe you should go with them, you always said you’d find them, now you have, go be with them” the girl gripped onto the director’s hand, she knew Olly would listen to her, he may be in command, but she was his best friend, that mattered more.

“Fine, I leave the bridge in your capable hands Callie.”

Olly excited the elevator, walking down the hallway to his room. He brought up his key card, unlocking the door. He felt a warm breath down his neck, “You have your own room.”

Strong arms gripped onto his body, “I know” the voice spoke near Olly’s ear.

“And I have reports to write.” The red-head rested his head in the other’s neck

“I’ll watch you” Lips were pressed to Olly’s temple

“Fine, come on Dameron.”

 

Olly had just finished writing when in the corner of his eye, he spotted Poe staring at him with eyes as if he had accomplished his lifelong dream, he sudden acknowledgement causing Olly to blush, “Why are you staring at me like that?” he asked, not looking away from his work.

“Because I’m worried if I look away, you’ll disappear.” The pilot said as his dreamy eyes remained. He got up from the soft chair he sat in, placing his head between the nook of Olly’s neck. “Come on, you’ve been working for hours”

“Yeah but it has to be done” the brunet boy sighed from the other’s continuation of his work. Not accepting defeat, he unexpectedly picked up the boy into his arms, carrying him over to the bed as Olly squirmed, “You can finish it off later.” Poe placed the boy on the bed, dropping down next to him with a smile that would’ve brought Snoke to his knees. The wriggling boy stilled, facing victory of the handsome boy beside him, copying the contagious smile.

 

_They laid there, side-by-side on Olly’s bed, looking into each other’s eyes longingly. Their mutual silence was eventually broken by Poe, “Did you ever kiss anyone on earth?”_

_Olly’s face scrunched up in confusion, “No, never been that close to anyone, why d’you ask?”_

_“Just curious, I haven’t either, no one’s good looking enough” His arm moved up Olly’s pink skin, “Have you ever wanted to try it?”_

_Olly’s eyes inverted his eyes elsewhere, “I guess” he quickly turned his eyes back to Poe_

_“Wanna try?” the brunet’s mouth turned into a grin_

_The other nodded and leaned in closer, stopping inches away, not knowing what to do next._

_Being the dominant one between the two friends, Poe connected their lips, making sure to be gentle at first. He waited before it seemed Olly had become comfortable, cupping the boy’s face in his hands. The kiss lasted a minute before both parted for air. They smiled at each other, their faces beaming with joy._

_They hadn’t kissed each other after that, both finding it a bit too bizarre to do with each other._

“Did you ever kiss anyone else?”

The question brought a smirk to the boy’s face, “Didn’t feel right kissing someone else”

Poe’s hand grazed up the pink arm, “Wanna try?”

They laughed in unison from the Deja vu that was happening between them, “Sure, why not”

They moved their faces closer to each other without breaking eye contact, savouring the moment, they pressed them lips to one another as they kissed a passion fuelled kiss that both had needed for years, a kiss both had waited and longed for.

They broke apart, resting their foreheads together, heavy panting being the lone sound in the room. Hungry for more, Poe reconnected their mouths, pulling Olly on top of him before putting one hand on the back of his head, deepening the kiss while the other slung around the boy’s torso. Olly’s own hands were cupping the pilots head, stabilising his head as to make the kiss more comfortable.

Both boys shared the thought of not going further nor stopping, they just wanted to love, something that had been taken from them for so long.

After what felt like an eternity, they parted once more, their breathing being more laboured then before, Olly looked back at the brunet, observing the lines imbedded under his eyes from exhaustion, “You need sleep”

“I need you” Poe smiled innocently

“You have me, but you also need sleep” Olly got up from his place on Poe, walking to his wardrobe where he fished out two pairs of nightwear, chucking one at the disappointed boy sulking on the bed, Olly quickly changed, not daring to look at he other due to the risk they might never fall asleep.

Finally finishing, he looked over at Poe to see him stripped to his underwear, laying on the bed looking back at the red-head.

Olly moved under the covers of the bed, shortly followed by Poe who closed the gaps amid their bodies, his arms falling on Olly’s back while Olly’s gently wrapped themselves around the pilot’s neck. Looking at the person in his arms, Poe felt complete, he no longer cared what would happen next, if Olly was with him, it would be worth it.

**Author's Note:**

> Sorry if it doesn't make sense  
> Tell me if you want me to continue with the story.


End file.
